I don't own Gundam Wing or the characters... although I wish I did. Gundam Wing is the property of its creators who are wonderful people for producing such an amazing series - I love you guys! (And the Gundam boys too! (^_-). I'm making no money from this fic. Don't bother suing me, I spent all my money on anime!

This takes place 5 years after the events of the OAV series Endless Waltz.

***

The wedding was a complete success. The bride looked beautiful in a simple cream satin dress and a hat that accentuated her big eyes and delicate features. The groom was dressed in black offset by a satin waistcoat that matched his eyes. Both bride and groom wore wide smiles as they walked down the aisle, and the groom kept sneaking kisses from the bride (which held up the procession a bit!). The best man didn't look happy, he simply glowered (but then, this was his usual expression and the chief bridesmaid swore that there was a hint of a smile on his lips… sometimes). The bridesmaids were almost as giggly as the bridal couple, and would applaud every time the groom kissed the bride.

In place of family, of which neither bride nor groom had, there were several friends, each displaying a range of emotions in regard to the day.

Quatre looked thrilled.

Noin and Zechs were indulgent.

Lady Une looked wistful.

Sally was grinning.

Wufei looked cross.

And Trowa… had no expression whatsoever visible. No surprise there!

Anyway, the entire party moved out to the reception hall where an obscene amount of food and a band awaited them. At one end of the hall a table groaned under the weight of a ten tier chocolate wedding cake and a ton of gifts. It took a lot of effort on the part of Heero and Relena to prevent Duo and Hilde from zooming ahead of the scheduled program to start opening presents and eating cake.

Finally, the main wedding party, consisting of the bride and groom, the bridesmaids, the best man and their seven close friends all sat down at the main table. The rest of the tables were occupied with the various other friends and acquaintances Hilde and Duo had acquired over the years, including Quatre's 40 odd Maganacs who took up two tables!

Duo was grinning like a maniac - more so than usual. His decision to marry Hilde had to be one of the best he'd ever made, he hadn't felt like this since... well, since he first sat in Deathscythe!

It might be noted that Duo had NOT felt like this earlier in the morning when he woke up and was hit by the realization that he was getting married. Heero had arrived in time to stop him from climbing out of the window and running. Heero's reason for stopping him had stemmed from two reasons: 1. He could foresee that Duo's disappearance would make Hilde upset and that would be noisy and disruptive. 2. Heero had been reading up on weddings and was taken aback to discover that there was an old tradition that if the groom ran off the best man had to marry the bride. Heero didn't think Hilde would follow this, but he wasn't taking any chances.

So Heero whipped out his gun and trained it on Duo, telling the nervous man in no uncertain terms that Duo was going through with the wedding. To be fair, Heero did give Duo two options - either get married in perfect health _or_ with shattered kneecaps. Duo decided the former was much more preferable to the latter and stopped trying to run. Now he was glad he hadn't, especially after the kiss(es).

Hilde kept looking at her wedding ring and muttering "Hilde Maxwell, Hilde _Maxwell_!" under her breath. She still couldn't quite believe that she had managed to get Duo to _commit_ his life to her. She turned to him and found him smiling at her. They kissed again and Hilde giggled.

Heero eyed the pair warily and wondered if it would be a good thing to substitute the champagne for lemonade. No, probably too late anyway.

Relena noticed Heero's frown and sighed. It was probably too much to hope that Heero would relax despite this being his best friend's wedding day. She glanced over at her brother and Noin who were obviously remembering their own wedding day two years ago from the soppy way they were looking at each other.

Relena wrinkled her nose and devoutly hoped that when it came her time to marry that she wouldn't act so silly. Of course, this was assuming that a certain moody pilot ever asked her to get married!

Beside Relena, Cathrine Bloom chattered with Quatre. They had become very good friends due to their mutual affection for Trowa. Presently they were sighing over the wedding ceremony and saying how _romantic_ it had been. Every now and then Quatre would glance in Trowa's direction and smile.

Trowa was concentrating on his food and talking to Lady Une. Or rather, Lady Une was talking to Trowa and occasionally being answered with "Ah." or "Hn." He seemed to be happy though.

However, Wufei did _not_ look happy. He kept muttering under his breath about the foolishness of marriage. Beside him Sally Po was beginning to lose her almost eternal patience, she kept fiddling with her glass and looked slightly annoyed. Everyone was taking bets about how long it would be until Sally poured her champagne all over Wufei.

Finally it was time for the speeches. As well as Heero's speech as best man, the other Gundam pilots AND Relena had asked to speak. Duo was a bit dubious about the idea, after all, he was nervous enough about _Heero's_ speech! Hilde, however, was very enthusiastic about the whole thing.

Heero stood up. He didn't call for silence or even tap his glass, he just glared and the hall quietened immediately. Duo swallowed, he had a bad feeling about this...

Heero began.

"When I first met Duo, he shot me. Twice." He paused. "It hasn't gotten any better since then."

"Heeeey!!!"

"After I got to know Duo, which didn't take very long, as he filled me in on his life, interests, hobbies and other miscellaneous facts during the first three hours of our 'friendship' I realised that I was dealing with no ordinary Gundam pilot. Obviously he had killed the person who was supposed to be the original pilot and taken their place."

"Uhh... thanks, I think." Duo grimaced, he should've known!

Heero continued. "However, I cannot overlook the fact that without Duo's help I would never have been able to repair Unit 01."

"Help?" Duo spluttered indignantly. "You STOLE parts off MY Gundam!"

Heero ignored the comments. He'd had a lot of practice at this.

"When I first met Hilde, I was impressed that she had managed to win Duo's affections, since she was so quiet. Then I realised that she was unconscious. Once she came round, I began to see why they were perfect for each other. Neither of them EVER shut up!"

"Mmmuhhh..." Hilde whimpered.

"Anyway, working with Duo for so long... so very, very long... has given me a great appreciation for his talents. His fighting skills, his piloting skills, his engineering skills, his hacking skills, and the way that he never seemed to use the air in his Gundam up any faster than the rest of us despite talking more than the rest of us put together."

Quatre and Trowa snorted.

Heero moved on to the next speech card. "I will always love and cherish the eternal friendship my time with Duo has developed. Never will I forget how he held me in his arms and..." his voice trailed off. Quickly, he scanned the rest of the card. Then he checked the next. And the next. Finally he stopped and threw them at Duo.

"I'm sorry, my speech cards seem to have been hacked into," he said.

Duo started scanning the cards, blanching occasionally and finally blushing a beet red. Hilde hummed softly to herself and inspected her nails. Duo shot her a suspicious glance. She blew him a kiss and his suspicions were confirmed.

"Fortunately I have backups. Unfortunately they are not here. So I shall continue from memory." Heero paused. "Duo has always been an able warrior, and I'm sure that if he dedicates as much energy to Hilde and his marriage as he did to his Gundam and the battles, then their marriage will be extremely successful. Also very noisy. I hope they will keep it down a little though, since I am staying in their spare room, however I suppose that there is no such thing as a miracle."

Duo and Hilde smiled sickeningly at each other.

"So, may their marriage be happy and fruitful... and I want them to know that I will be available as godfather to their children..." Heero paused, and paled. "Children... children... _Maxwell_ children..."

He sat down abruptly and reached for the champagne.

Duo whistled. "Oi oi... I don't think I've _ever_ heard Heero say that much in the entire time I've known him!"

Relena shrugged. "You gave him a mission, and you know that Heero takes missions _very_ seriously!"

Duo nodded. "Yeah," he turned to Hilde. "I guess that wasn't too bad, eh, Hildey?"

"Er... I guess not."

Trowa got to his feet and raised his glass. Everyone listened attentively.

"Good luck." said Trowa in his quiet, serious voice.

And then he sat down.

"That's it?" Zechs queried.

Noin shrugged. "Trowa is a man of few, very few, words."

Duo grinned at Trowa. "Hey, I appreciate the good wishes! Thanks Trowa!"

Trowa regarded him. "I was addressing Hilde." he said.

Duo looked crushed.

Hilde cleared her throat. "Uhh... so who's next?" she asked cheerfully (hopefully).

Wufei stood up abruptly. "Me." he annouced glaring at the entire assembly.

Sally frowned noticing that he was swaying slightly on his feet. She checked the champagne bottle they were sharing. *Hmmm... empty and I've only just started my second glass. Oh dear.*

Wufei began his speech. "Maxwell is not someone I would call sensible. Noisy, reckless and annoying - yes, sensible - no. And he's just proven me correct by going through this exercise in futility."

Duo groaned and slumped into his chair. "Here we go..."

Wufei ignored him. "_I_ was married once, when I was younger, against my own desire... it was an unmitigated disaster of course."

"Wufei!" Sally reproved him.

He glanced down at her. "Be silent woman, I'm speaking here!" he looked back up, frowning. "Of course Maxwell's choice of wife is someone compatible with his own personality. Hilde has proven herself just as talkative and reckless and is more likely to cheer Maxwell on as he charges around causing chaos than to pull him back."

Duo turned to Hilde. "Would you?"

"As long as it was fun!"

"That's ok then."

Wufei shuddered slightly (along with Trowa and Heero - who was steadily downing glass after glass of champagne). He continued.

"Despite this I'm sure they will be happy enough, if they don't do anything stupid, which is probably too much to hope for..."

"Heeey!!" objected Duo and Hilde.

"Wufei, wrap it up already!" Noin called.

"*Achem*...or as long as Hilde doesn't get herself _killed_ trying to prove herself - although she already tried that and disrupted a battle..."

"Excuuuse me?" Hilde growled. "I risked my life to get that data from Libra to you guys!"

"That was YOU?" Zechs cried.

"Which proves my point!" Wufei cried ignoring Zechs' outburst. "That women are not and will never be... Woman! What are you doing?!" he yelled at Sally.

Swiftly Sally wrenched the microphone from Wufei's grasp and pushed him down onto his seat. Before he could get up she sat on his lap and smiled at the guests.

"I'm sorry about that," she said. "I think the wine has gone to his head."

Wufei shoved at Sally, his face red with embarrassment. "Get off me Woman!"

Sally braced herself against the table and ignored him. Smiling she nodded at Hilde and Duo. "I'm sure you'll be very happy."

"Th-thanks Sally." Hilde quavered. She was torn between the desire to laugh at Wufei's predicament and the urge to go and help Sally squash him.

"Yeah," added Duo. "Thanks."

"My turn!" cried Quatre leaping to his feet.

"Hooray! Quatre-sama!!!" the Maganacs cheered, whistled and clapped loudly. Quatre blushed. "Thank you..." he said modestly. Everyone else just rolled their eyes (except for Wufei who was still trapped by Sally and Heero who was working on a world record for drinking).

Duo perked up, Quatre's speech was _bound_ to be nice!  Hilde was looking a bit upset by the last speech, which made Duo upset, and while a fight was fun Duo knew she wouldn't like it on her wedding day. Although she probably wouldn't object to beating up Wufei at the moment. He grinned encouragingly at her, hugging her around the shoulders and she beamed at him.

"Okay Q-man!" Duo flashed the blond the thumbs-up. "I'm counting on you to make this the best speech ever!"

Quatre blushed again. "I'll try Duo." he looked up. "First off all I'd like to say that I'm really happy to be here on this special day! The ceremony was lovely - very romantic, and it's great to see all of my friends here together." he beamed at the assembled company. "I'm sure that this is a wonderful sign of the happy, loving life that Hilde and Duo are going to have together - I'm sure we all envy them!"

"Speak for yourself!" cried Wufei whom Sally had now freed.

Quatre blinked but continued on. "I've always found Duo to be a fun person to be around, but at the same time he's a great pilot and a good ally in battle."

Duo smirked. "I know... I'm great." he said.

Hilde elbowed him in the ribs. "Not when your ego is out of control!"

"Anyway," Quatre said. "When I finally met Hilde I saw how perfect she was for Duo..." he paused. "Actually, to be honest I _heard_ her first, calling over the com for Duo," Quatre sighed. "It was really sweet."

Everyone gagged slightly. Hilde blushed.

"Of course, when I did see her she was unconscious..." Quatre told them in a burst of complete honesty.

"Will people STOP talking about that!" Hilde broke in. "I know it wasn't the best of first impressions, but I'd just been fighting against two mobile dolls with the data of Heero and Trowa! Give me a break!" she pleaded almost tearfully.

Quatre looked close to tears himself. "I'm sorry Hilde, I didn't mean to imply..."

"Don't worry about it Q," Duo flung an arm around Hilde's shoulder. "Hildey's just sensitive about it that's all!"

Lady Une shook her head. "Open mouth, insert foot." she sighed.

Hilde flung Duo's arm off and glared at him. "What do you mean by _that_?!" she demanded. "Do you think I'm useless too?"

Relena quickly removed all throwable objects from Hilde's vicinity.

Duo spluttered. "Hildey... I never..."

"Duo, just give it up," said Zechs. "Whatever you say is going to be wrong, that's the way of married life."

Noin arched an eyebrow. "And what does _that_ mean?" she asked.

Zechs sighed. "Case in point." he said.

Hilde looked at Zechs and Noin, and her anger vanished. She relaxed and laughed, Duo finally joined in. Relena replaced the cutlery she'd removed.

Quatre was still standing and looked baffled. He looked at Trowa who gave him a supportive nod. Nervously Quatre began again with the manner of someone choosing his words with great care.

"Uh... I wish Duo and Hilde all the best for the future. They obviously love each other very much and are on the same wavelength. I'd like to wrap up this speech by offering my services as another godfather to their future children, and babysitter too, I hope they have LOTS!" Quatre finished enthusiastically.

Trowa, Wufei and Heero went white. Heero picked up the champagne bottle and slugged the wine straight down.

Hilde also went a bit pale - she'd _heard_ things about childbirth!

Duo, however, was applauding loudly (along with all the Maganacs). "Great speech!" he cheered Quatre. "I knew I could count on _you_, Quatre!"

"And I hope you can count on me!" said Relena getting to her feet. "Ladies and Gentlemen, I'd like to say a few words."

The hall went quiet. Relena bowed slightly to the guests and began.

"First of all, I'd like to thank Hilde for choosing me as her bridesmaid, I'm very honoured."

Hilde smiled up at her. "Hey, as if I'd leave you out of the fun!"

Relena laughed. "Yes... fun has played a big part of our friendship." she said grinning back at Hilde. "Although I met Duo first, it was under rather confusing circumstances invloving Heero, guns, Gundams and theft. Let's just leave it at that anyway. I met Hilde onboard when she came to steal the plans for Libra..."

"I still can't believe it was HER!" muttered Zechs.

"Hilde came up behind me and asked me if I knew a Gundam pilot, people seem to ask me that alot..." Relena mused, she blinked and got back on track. "*Achem* We talked for a while and she offered to take me off Libra..."

"Good thing you didn't take her up on that offer!" muttered Duo. Hilde elbowed him in the ribs. "Owww..."

Relena continued. "Hilde and I renewed our friendship after the battle and I also got to know Duo better. For the past five years I've been a regular visitor to their home and I've always enjoyed my stay. The whoopee cushions on my chair, the hair dye in my shampoo, the fake spider in my bed, the exploding porridge..." Relena paused. "Actually, after a stay at Duo and Hilde's I _want_ to get back to serious work."

Hilde and Duo looked at each other. "Is she making fun of us?" Duo asked suspiciously.

Hilde shrugged. "With Relena, sometimes it's hard to tell."

Relena permitted herself a small smile. "Let's just say that you two provide a good dose of silliness in my life, so I hope you continue to be just as happy - and silly - in your married life!" shee raised her glass and bowed to them.

"That's nice," said Duo. "And Relena, you've reminded me, I forgot to perform one of the groom's privileges."

Relena frowned. "What's that?"

"To kiss the bridesmaids!" Duo leaned over to her.

"DUO!!!!" Hilde yanked him back into his seat by the braid.

"OUCH!" Duo sulked. "That hurt Hildey!"

"Good." muttered Heero in Duo's ear. "Don't try that again."

Duo sweatdropped. "Er... anyone else want to say something?"

Zechs stood up, he looked vaguely confused. "Er... well, I don't know _why_ I'm doing this," he said. "After all I don't really know Duo and Hilde that well, although I've heard stories..."

Duo and Hilde looked totally innocent... no one was fooled for a second.

"But while I wish them all the best," Zechs continued. "What I'd really like to say is... has anyone noticed that Heero has finished two champagne bottles off all by himself and is halfway through his third? It might be a good idea to remove the alcohol from his general vicinity."

Everyone looked at Heero who ignored them and slugged back another glass. Duo made a grab for the bottle.

*Click!*

Duo found himself staring at Heero's gun. Heero regarded his friend with a steely (if a bit unfocused) glare.

"O-omae o korosu..." he snarled. Then he wobbled and his eyes rolled back.

*Thud* Gravity claimed Heero as a friend.

Duo looked down at the fallen best man and let out the breath he'd been holding. With a shrug he sat down.

"Okay, let's continue!"

Relena and Hilde stared at him in shock.

"Duo!" cried Relena. "Heero's lying there unconscious and you're just going to leave him there?"

"Yup!" Duo grinned. "He'll be fine, besides... he was going to shoot me before he passed out."

"He only does that to people he likes." said Relena.

Everyone now stared at her, Relena's eyes widened. "Well, he's _always_ threatening to kill his friends," she said. "And he never does!"

Quatre nodded thoughtfully. "Actually that does make sense."

"In an odd way." added Sally.

Noin laughed and stood up, glass in hand. "Well, this has been one of the more eventful weddings I've been to in a while! I can't add much to what everyone has already said, and I probably shouldn't since Duo and Hilde have probably heard more than they wanted to hear!"

Duo sighed. "Oi, you can say that again."

Hilde patted his head. "There there..." she cooed. "It's nearly over now..."

"You're not helping Hildey."

Noin went on. "I'll just confine myself to wishing you good luck, Duo, and I won't even mention the time you re-rigged Peacemillion's engines so we were going backwards instead of forwards..."

"DUO!!! You #%@*&!!!!" cried Howard from one of the other tables. "That was YOU???!!!"

"Erheheheh..." Duo laughed nervously. "Thanks Noin, I was hoping NOT to remember that!"

Noin grinned evily. "Lucky Hilde, he's your problem now..."

Hilde sighed theatrically. "I know, is it too late to trade him in for a better model?"

"HILDE!!!!" Duo stared at her.

She kissed him. "Duo, I'm kidding, I wouldn't trade you for the world."

"Oh please..." choked Wufei. "Some of us have just eaten."

Noin raised her glass high. "Ladies, Gentlemen and Gundam pilots... a toast to the bride and groom!"

"BANZAI!!!!" everyone cheered (including Heero who had woken up - Relena was keeping the champagne away from him though).

Duo got to his feet and held out his hands for silence.

"Thanks everyone!" Duo said. "I'm really pleased that you came to celebrate today with me and Hilde. Special thanks go to the wedding party for all their hard work and the... entertaining speeches." a bigger than usual grin worked it's way across Duo's face. "I look forward to returning the favour at _your_ weddings!" he said with signficant looks at Heero and Wufei. Heero twitched and Wufei paled and looked at Sally who was smiling sweetly at him. Duo snickered. "I have some _good_ speeches in mind!"

***

The End
 

Authors note: Well, this is my first GW fic and came about after attending a friends wedding and I started to imagine the sort of speeches the G-boys would make. I chose Duo's wedding because he's the easiest to tease (^_^) and I really, really wanted Heero to do the best man's speech! Arigato to Jaelle for writing Heero's speech - she came up with _such_ good lines that I insisted she do it!